My ceiling fan has not been turned off in six days. If I spontaneously combust, I just hope it’s not near my bookshelf.

I don’t know if anyone here watches either of the Battlestar Galactica series’, but I’ve got a little rant prepared. The old Battlestar Galactica from 1978 was AWESOME. Yes, it was cheesy as all get-out. But it was *good*. I highly recommend everyone see at least one episode. Specifically keep an eye out for the fake dog, because that was actually a chimpanzee inside a suit. I just recently found this out, but it makes sense because the thing moves very oddly and I was always wondering what exactly was inside it. It was a rather ground-breaking series for its time. Oh, and it’s really funny, I came across this article saying that it was full of anti-Soviet propaganda. That’s hilarious now, looking back on it, although I guess maybe at the time they thought a short-lived scifi series was corrupting the minds of Americans. Anyway, this has nothing to do with the rant. The rant is that they have made a new Battlestar Galactica, which is very little like the original. One of the coolest characters in the old series was Starbuck, a daredevil pilot who liked to smoke cigars and gamble. He was like Han Solo, minus the Wookiee and plus a noble cause. He also had this awesome 70s haircut. In the new series, Starbuck is still a cigar-smoking pilot, only now she’s a girl (that’s her on the right). They also turned Boomer, an African American male pilot, into a female Oriental pilot who, surprise surprise, is really a Cylon. Or something. Commander Cain is also a girl, and the leader of the entire fleet is no longer Adama, but a female president. Basically they took almost all of the cool guys and made them girls, and completely ditched all of the original female characters. The Cylons, who used to be creepy drones in brilliant armor with huge blasters, are now lingerie models (no joke). As a classic scifi fan, this saddens and depresses me. Fortunately, Scifi channel plays reruns of the old BSG, so you too can become a fan of the true Battlestar! *toothpaste commercial smile*

Oh phooey, I was going to write more but I have to go to bed. I have a bajillion hours this week at Staples.